One year ago today Vic and I started this blog. I didn't realise one year later I would be here and he wouldn't. At that time I guess we had no idea of the enormity of what was going to happen to us. We had been married a week at that time and it seemed we could get through it together whatever happened. It became very clear not long after that, that wouldn't be the case.
I often wonder what we would be doing now if Vic were still here. I've had to do so many things without him in the flesh but he is always with me I just can't see him. I think about him all the time. What would he say about this, what would he make of that, would he paint that wall that colour, etc, etc. I guess the answer has always been whatever the decision was it was rarely we disagreed.
Everyday is different, every anniversary is hard but I feel better when they have passed and I have managed to get through and cope. I find if I am not pressured I can live those 24 hours of memories in my own way and the quieter that day is the better. The next one will by my birthday and thats ready to be seen through as quietly as possible.
Anyway, I just felt it was right to mark the anniversary of this blog. The thousands of words we and I have written have helped me, Vic and all our family and friends but now I feel this should be the end of this blog. It will be on the internet forever but I think it did it's job it told all the news and now there is no more news to share.
For the last time I want to thank everyone who ever looked at this and everyone who left messages. I don't think you will ever understand how much it has meant.
God bless you all.
